Golf    can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the    occasional miracle, followed by a good bottle of beer.
Golf! You hit    down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The    lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks
Golf    is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to play your foul balls.
If    you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even during a    hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.
Golfers who    try to make every thing perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect    shot.
The term 'mulligan' is really a contraction of the phrase 'maul    it again.'
A 'gimme' can best be defined as an agreement between two    golfers ... neither of whom can putt very well.
An interesting thing    about golf is that no matter how badly you play; it is always possible to get    worse.
Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice    it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you    go out and for no reason at all you really stink.
If your best shots    are the practice swing and the 'gimme putt', you might wish to reconsider this    game.
Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.  
Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't    work , and both are expensive.
The best wood in most amateurs' bags is    the pencil. 
 
 
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